Impossible
by Flying is Freedom
Summary: Fang left Max heartbroken. She tries to be strong for the flock but sometimes her walls have to come down.


**The song is Impossible by Shontelle. I do not own the song or Maximum Ride.**

I trudged into the house. Luckily the weekend was almost over. When in school, as long as I didn't see _him_ the pain was bearable. When the weekends came and I was left alone the pain washed over me like a tsunami, threatening to wash me away. I walked up to my room. Trying in vain to stop thinking about _him_. I sat on my bed and opened my diary, several sheets of paper fell out. A song I had written. One glance and the words I had come up with instantly flowed back to me. I began to sing.

 _ **I remember years ago**_

 _ **Someone told me I should take**_

 _ **Caution when it comes to love**_

 _ **I did, I did**_

 _ **And you were strong and I was not**_

 _ **My illusion my mistake**_

 _ **I was carless, I forgot**_

 _ **I did**_

 _ **And now all is done**_

 _ **There is nothing to say**_

 _ **You have gone and so effortlessly**_

 _ **You have won**_

 _ **You can go ahead and tell them**_

My parents never really loved each other. I was just an experiment. They wanted to see what would happen. Unfortunately they started to get attached to each other, bonding over me just to be ripped apart. I was given to my father who was a shell of the man he had been. I could see it in his eyes, he was broken. He warned me not to get too attached to anything, not to fall I love. I listened.

I went to school, grew up, made friends but didn't keep any of them close. I was afraid to get attached. Then, I met Fang, a beautiful dark haired god. He made me feel like I had never felt before. I didn't know it but I was in love. We hung out and grew closer but I didn't open up all the way, couldn't open up all the way. Fang noticed.

 _ **Tell them all I know now**_

 _ **Shout it from the rooftops**_

 _ **Write it on the skyline**_

 _ **All we had is gone now**_

 _ **Tell them I was happy**_

 _ **And my heart is broken**_

 _ **All my scars are open**_

 _ **Tell them I what I hoped would be**_

 _ **Impossible, impossible**_

 _ **Impossible, impossible**_

Looking back walking away from that relationship was the biggest mistake I ever made. I was young and I was stupid and I didn't let myself feel. The pain I felt when I walked away was a broken heart but I didn't know it until after I was too far gone to turn back. It was impossible that I would fall so hard for a guy. Impossible that walking away could make me feel so badly. Impossible that the pain in my chest was going to go away and impossible that Fang would take me back.

 _ **Falling out of love is hard**_

 _ **Falling for betrayal is worst**_

 _ **Broken trust and broken hearts**_

 _ **I know, I know**_

 _ **Thinking all you need is there**_

 _ **Building faith on love and words**_

 _ **Empty promises will wear**_

 _ **I know (I know)**_

 _ **And now when all is gone**_

 _ **There is nothing to say**_

 _ **And if you're done with**_

 _ **Embarrassing me**_

 _ **On your own you can go and tell them**_

To make myself feel better I betrayed him, I cheated. Some guy named Dylan someone who did not share the same spark me and Fang had. I tried to break his heart. Make him forget about me. It must have worked because the next day he showed up with Lisa. The way she looked at him, she was head over heels. That night I went home to cry, angry at myself and sad about losing Fang. The only thig I had ever really wanted belonged to someone else. I didn't want to go to school, I didn't want to have to face fang with another girl. Not ever.

 _ **Tell them all I know now**_

 _ **Shout it from the roof top**_

 _ **Write it on the skyline**_

 _ **All we had is gone now**_

 _ **Tell them I was happy**_

 _ **And my heart is broken**_

 _ **All my scars are open**_

 _ **Tell them what I hoped would be**_

 _ **Impossible, impossible**_

 _ **Impossible, impossible**_

 _ **Impossible, impossible**_

I had briefly considered talking to Fang, begging him to take me back but that seemed desperate. It seemed like I wanted him too much. In reality though, I did wasn't him. I needed him but it was impossible that I would fall so hard for a guy. Impossible that walking away could make me feel so badly. Impossible that the pain in my chest was going to go away and impossible that Fang would take me back.

 _ **Ooh impossible (yeah yeah)**_

Oh yeah, getting him would be impossible.

 _ **I remember years ago**_

 _ **Someone told me I should take**_

 _ **Caution when it comes to love**_

 _ **I did**_

And it was the worst mistake I ever made. Pretending that I didn't love Fang was like pretending that I had wings. I listened to my parents and still managed to make the same mistake they did. I fell in love only to get my heart broken, but unlike them it wasn't broken by someone else. I had done it to myself…

 _ **Tell them all you know now**_

 _ **Shout it from the rooftop**_

 _ **Write it on the skyline**_

 _ **Tell them I was happy (tell them I was happy)**_

 _ **And my heart is broken**_

 _ **All my scars are open**_

 _ **Tell them what I hoped would be**_

 _ **Impossible, impossible**_

 _ **Impossible, impossible**_

 _ **Impossible, impossible**_

It was impossible that he would come back to me. I had broken his heart. I had tried in vain to make him hurt. In the end I only hurt me. That realization struck me like a brick. Even if Fang didn't need me I needed him. For the first time I hated my dad for telling me not to feel. For telling me not to get attached. Maybe if I had opened up Fang would be sitting with me. I closed my eyes and put all the pain hurt and passion I felt into the lyrics.

 _ **I remember years ago**_

 _ **Someone told me I should take**_

 _ **Caution when it comes to love**_

 _ **I did**_

I opened my eyes and found myself wishing that there was some way that Fang could have been able to hear the song. Able to hear the pain that ran through my body every time I thought about him. Able to tell how much I wanted to get back together with him. How much I loved him.

It would never happen. He was happy now, he had Lisa, he had someone that loved him and showed him it every day. I took the pieces of paper I had written the song on and balled them up, wanting to shred it but not being able to fully destroy such a beautiful thing. Then I took my diary. The one that only talked about one thing. How much I loved Fang and wanted him back.

I ran to the window, tears streaming freely down my face. I realized that the window was already open, anyone who wanted to hear my pain could have. It just added insult to injury. I chucked the notebook and the balls of paper out of the window. Never wanting to see them again. I slumped down in the window seat. Looking out into the distance without seeing anything.

"Max…" Someone called from below. It couldn't be .I looked down out of the window. Of course it was impossible.

 **So there is my attempt at a song-fic one shot. Hope you liked it. For those of you who are reading Star Struck I will try to update that in the next three days. Fly on.**


End file.
